Ophelia's Place is committed to supporting young women to make healthy life choices through support, prevention and education from well-accepted approaches and standards of care.

For more information, contact Kyra Kelly, Prevention Services Coordinator, 284-4333 or email: kyrakelly@opheliasplace.net.

We offer:

Resource & Referral Services
*Short-term, solution-focused therapy (Individual and/or Family)
Girls' Support Groups
Career Counseling
A Supportive Environment for Girls (see our Drop-in Guide, below)

*Please note: We happily accept credit cards, cash and checks as payment for services. We have a very reasonable sliding scale payment option for counseling services. This scale is based on your income and circumstances. We feel strongly that fees for service shouldn't be a barrier.

We don't offer:

Mental Health or Psychiatric Evaluations, assessments, diagnoses, or labels
Medication prescriptions or adjustments
Mandated services
Adult counseling
Legal Advice
Payments via Insurance or OHP*(see above)

A Parent/Guardian Guide to Drop-in Services:
We welcome your daughters and young women. Here is some info to help everyone have the best possible experience with our Drop-In Services.

What is Drop-In?
From 3-6 PM, Monday - Thursday, girls are welcome to access our center as a safe place to spend time after school. During this time, OP staff can meet with any girl who has a concern or question, needs support or resource information. This is the primary purpose of our drop-in center. Girls who come to Ophelia’s Place regularly for drop-in tend to have the best experience if they come for an hour or two maximum per visit. We do our best to build relationships with girls and interact with them at the level they request. However, we rely on volunteers to help staff our drop-in center and we do not have the capacity to actively entertain girls throughout the day. Girls who come to recreate should do so expecting that their activities should be self-directed and self-sustaining. Arts and crafts supplies and snacks are available in limited quantities. If girls plan to be here for more than 5 hours per week, we appreciate them bringing their own healthy snacks. Computer access is limited to 30 minutes per day, per girl unless a girl has a school-related need for more computer time.

Getting Started:
Girls accessing drop-in services are expected to have fully completed a scheduled Orientation session and filled out the necessary paperwork. Please be prepared to schedule a time for you and your daughter to come back together if the Orientation and paperwork has not already been completed. If your daughter is 14 or older she may elect to come to the Orientation on her own. These Orientations must be scheduled in advance and are required for girls to access drop-in services on a regular basis. Girls under the age of 14 MUST have parental consent to access services, including drop-in.

Why Orientations?
We do our best to offer individualized support and attention to each young woman we meet, and meeting her face to face during an Orientation allows us the opportunity to get to know her, discuss her needs and interests and explain all of our available services. We find that this is crucial for creating & maintaining a sense of personal connection, emotional safety, respect for property and agency agreements, confidentiality, an accurate understanding of our services and mission, and quality service delivery.

No-School Day Activities:
Ophelia’s Place strives to offer fun, structured activities for girls during non-school days. Again, this may be limited due to staff/volunteer availability. Please check our website for more details on what we are offering on specific non-school days.

Checking In:
Upon check-in, all girls must sign in and provide a working emergency contact number to get in touch with you.

Checking Out:
Girls must sign out when they leave. All girls must be picked up by 6 PM. We will not be able to supervise your daughter past 6 PM. If you are not able to pick up your daughter by 6 PM, please arrange for her to meet you elsewhere. We do have phones available here for girls to use. If you would like girls to check in with you when they arrive or depart, they are welcome to use our phones. Ophelia’s’ Place is not responsible for girls once they leave the premises.

UPCOMING SCHOOL PRESENTATIONS:

Peers as Allies School Presentation
6th Grade

Introduce Presenters and Ophelia’s Place

Introduce topic – Peers as Allies
What is an ally? – one that is helpful to another often for mutual benefit

Presentation Guidelines (Written on board – Terrific vs. Not Cool)

Ask class – how do we want to treat each other to create a space that feels safe, friendly, caring? Include:

RESPECT each other and respect the speakers

One person talks at a time
No side comments, laughing at others, or put downs
Okay to disagree but respect and appreciate each other’s opinions
Pay attention and participate

Confidentiality

Keep what’s said in here, in here
Don’t talk about people who aren’t here

Have fun but take topic seriously

Icebreaker – Name game with quality about self they are most proud of and a motion to go with it that everyone is encouraged to say/do together.

True friend worksheet – What I look for in a friend…

Discussion – Anyone want to share something they learned about themselves?

Body outlines –

Discrimination – ways people show bias around sex, race, family’s financial status, size, sexual orientation, religion, abilities
Bullying and relational aggression, - ways people are mean, intimidating backstabbing, hurtful, gang up on you or exclude you etc.
Sexual harassment – ways people violate personal space/physical boundaries
Bystander – saying nothing while someone else gets hurt
Ally - kind and supportive stuff a friend says and does

Discussion – Go over the body outlines

Why do you think some people are so mean to others? Different, feel bigger, jealous
Do you ever stay friends with someone that treats you this way? Why is it hard to stand up to them sometimes? Has anyone had a good experience standing up to a friend and resolving a conflict non-violently?
Do you know what stereotypes/cliques are?
Are there stereotypes/cliques in your school?
Why do people form cliques? How are they hurtful to people both in and outside the clique? What are some of the pros and cons of cliques that you’ve heard of or experienced?
How big of a problem would you say this kind of stuff is at your school? Why or why not?
What can you do to make cliques less exclusive and hurtful? Look for things you have in common instead of focusing on the differences? Make friends in other groups.
How many of you know a person that is a really good friend, gets along with most everyone and is almost always kind? How does it make you want to treat them?

Next time:

we will look even more closely at the way we treat our friends,
talk about how to resolve conflicts with friends and stand up to bullies
and the role of bystanders and allies

DAY 2
Guideline reminders – Create an atmosphere that is warm and fuzzy - SCARF - Safe Caring Accepting Respectful Friendly

Introduce the Step into the Middle game. Ask them to write their name on a notecard and decorate it with things they like/personal emblem. Then line the class up in two lines facing each other about 6 feet apart. Instruct them to step into the middle if the statement you read is true for them and then step back into their line afterward.

Step into the middle if you have ever:
Eaten chocolate ice cream
Played a musical instrument
From now on when the statement is true for you and you step into the middle I’d like you to rip a little piece off of your name tag if it’s something that made you feel bad about yourself.
Been talked about behind your back
Called someone a name or put them down to hurt them
Stood by and did nothing while others picked on or hurt someone
Stood up for someone who was being picked on
Got in a physical fight with someone you were angry at
Believed something negative that someone else said about you
Been excluded from a group or event
Excluded someone else from a group
Picked on someone or turned on someone because other people were doing it
Spread gossip that you weren’t sure was true
Stopped gossip you knew wasn’t true or shouldn’t be spread
Lost a friend for an unknown reason
Dropped a friend because another friend wanted you to
Had a lie, rumor, or secret spread about you around school
Felt physically sick after having your feelings hurt by a friend
Felt physically sick after hurting a friend’s feelings
Missed school or skipped a class because you were afraid of what another student might do or say to or about you
Used the computer, telephone or cell phone to intentionally hurt someone
Felt uncomfortable because a classmate grabbed your butt, snapped your bra, or pantsed you
Defended yourself in such an aggressive way that it made you end up looking like the bad guy/person
Felt good about how you resolved a conflict with a friend

Discussion –

Most of us stepped into the middle for a lot of these actions – so most of us know what it feels like to be on the giving and receiving sides of hurtful behavior.
What were some of the differences you saw in ways that boys are more likely to hurt each other and what are the ways girls use?
Why do you think I had you rip away at your name tags?
What did it feel like to admit to some of the things you have done that have been hurtful?
Were any of you surprised by the amount of nice or hurtful things you’ve done?
Why is it sometimes hard to stand up for self or each other? Group mentality…

CONFLICT RESOLUTION

How can you resolve a situation when you are angry or hurt by a classmate or friend?

If someone is picking on you due to sex, race, religion, sexual orientation, abilities, your family’s financial status, or your size this is discrimination and it’s against the law. Name it “That’s sexual harassment” “That’s racism” “My religion is none of your business” “”My heart looks just like yours” “My feelings get hurt just like yours” “It’s against the law to say that to me you know”, “Does it make you feel better about yourself to pick on me?”
Ask for clarification if someone says something that hurts your feelings – maybe they didn’t mean it the way you took it or maybe they didn’t realize what they said was hurtful – tell them how it came across to you
Talk to them directly – don’t gossip to other friends –
Choose a good time and place to talk - not in front of an audience – but not alone if there is a safety concern –if needed, ask an adult to mediate a discussion
Talk in a calm and confident voice that is non accusing, hostile, or threatening – use strong posture and facial expressions that don’t give mixed messages
say what you mean – be concise – don’t lecture-
Might start out with a positive “We were good friends in the past and I like that you….but lately….”
Identify what the problem is and how it feels to you, use “I” statements
Tell them how you want to be treated – I need you to stop… or I need you to treat me….
Stay quiet and listen while the other person speaks
If appropriate, decide together what you want your relationship to be in the future – allies or just avoid each other
Know that you can’t change another person – they may laugh you off and continue doing what they were doing but you do have power over how you respond – respond in a way that you can feel proud of and empowered and that doesn’t worsen the situation by being a bully yourself – stand up for yourself and let them know you’re not going to be an easy target for them

BYSTANDERS

What can you do or say to someone who you see being hurtful to someone else?

DON’T LAUGH even though it’s uncomfortable
If you don’t feel comfortable saying something to the bully… Walk away – don’t take part – they’ll think you support and admire what they’re doing if you stand there
“What you are doing is against the law” “That sounds racist”
Does it make you feel better about yourself to be mean to…..
I really don’t think it’s cool to say stuff like that to/about someone
You don’t like it when someone says/does that to you so don’t be the bad guy
That wasn’t cool. You just looked like such a jerk
It’s getting kind of cold in here does anyone have a SCARF?
Stand up for each other – point out what you do appreciate about the person
Comfort or befriend the target

Top ways to be better allies…

Validate others… build each other up with compliments rather than digs
Include others who are being left out
Accept people for who they are, not what they look like
stop rumors… do not spread them
don’t gossip, say mean things about each other, pass notes, texts, or write stuff about others on the computer
treat others how you want to be treated
use your words to make thing right/better not wrong/worse

EVALUATIONS & OP brochures
If time: I love all my classmates game