Breaking the Silence: Talking Boundaries, Consent & Advocacy with Sexual Assault Support Services
April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month (SAAM) — a time to raise awareness, amplify survivor voices, and strengthen efforts to prevent sexual violence. This month, we had the honor of sitting with Elliot Gordon, the Outreach and Youth Advocacy Coordinator at Sexual Assault Support Services (SASS) in Eugene, Oregon to talk about SASS, how to set boundaries in relationships, and how youth can create safer spaces.
SASS is a nonprofit organization serving survivors of sexual violence throughout Lane County, offering support to individuals of all genders, backgrounds, and experiences, whether the assault happened recently or years ago.
Confidential Support — Anytime You Need It
SASS has support services that are unique and confidential. Their 24-hour crisis and support line, along with a weekday text and chat line (M–F, 9am–5pm), is available to anyone who needs someone to talk to — even if they’re not in an active crisis.
“What makes our line different is that it’s not just for emergencies,” Elliot explained. “Survivors can call even if they just want to talk about their options, process something, or get information. And everything shared is 100% confidential.”
SASS advocates are privileged advocates, meaning they are not mandatory reporters. That means survivors, including minors, can reach out without fear of anything being reported to ICE, police, teachers, hospitals, or family members. Legal confidentiality helps create a safer space where individuals can speak freely and explore their options without pressure.
Understanding Boundaries in Relationships
Elliot also broke down what healthy vs. unhealthy boundaries can look like in relationships, particularly for teens navigating new connections.
Unhealthy boundary signs include:
Checking your phone or social media without permission
Isolating you from your friends or family
Extreme jealousy or possessiveness
Explosive tempers or mood swings
Pressuring you to have sex or cross physical boundaries
On the flip side, healthy relationships involve:
Open conversations about emotional and physical comfort
Respecting each other’s time, space, and autonomy
Setting boundaries around digital sharing, finances, and physical touch
Feeling safe and supported — not fearful or “on eggshells”
“Boundaries are a two-way street,” Elliot said. “They should be discussed regularly and can change over time. You always have the right to re-evaluate and adjust them as you grow.”
What to Do If a Friend Is Being Harassed
Talking to a friend who might be experiencing harassment or relationship abuse can feel overwhelming, but Elliot shared some helpful tips:
Check in gently: Let them know you care. For example: “Hey, I’ve noticed some things and I just want to make sure you’re okay. I’m here for you.”
Center their safety: Don’t act without understanding what they need or want.
Create a safety plan together and find support lines or trusted adults.
Document harmful behaviors if safe to do so.
Reach out to SASS yourself — support people can also call the crisis line to talk through what they’re feeling or how to help their friend.
How Youth Can Create Safer Spaces
Elliot emphasized the power young people have in shaping safer schools and communities: “
Use your voice. Know your resources, share them, and don’t be afraid to speak up.
Start the hard conversations. Talking openly about consent, boundaries, and safety helps reduce stigma and normalize these critical topics.
Show up for each other. Whether that’s grabbing a consent sticker from a tabling booth, checking in on a friend, or asking a teacher to bring in a speaker — every action makes a difference.
Youth want to be involved. They care. And when you give them the right tools and language, they’ll go out and make real change in the world,” Elliot said.
Resources
If you or someone you know needs support, reach SASS at:
📞 24-Hour Crisis Line: 1-844-404-7700
Text & Chat Line (M–F, 9am–5pm): sass-lane.org
Visit loveisrespect.org for more tools on healthy relationships and boundaries for youth.
This interview was part of OP’s Sexual Assault Awareness Month (SAAM) efforts to spotlight local organizations making a difference. A huge thank you to Elliot and the SASS team for the critical, compassionate work you do every day to support survivors and create safer communities.
🧡 You are not alone. There is always a community ready to listen.